More in Seinfeld Quotes. They—they didn't move.”, “You've got ‘shiksappeal.’ Jewish men love the idea of meeting a woman that's not like their mother.”, “Listen to the comeback. Join Discussion ⇤ Back. 36. 1. Funny George Costanza quote with a vector graphic of his face. This is gonna be my time. All rights reserved. A garage. We either break up, which she would do anyway, but at least I go out with some dignity. Especially on a kid. What kind of a sick society are we living in when nice is bad?”, “I love a good nap. Of course, I'm the result of my parents having stayed together, so you never know.”, “Hey believe me, baldness will catch on. My life is the opposite of everything I want it to be. “My life is the complete opposite of everything I want it to be.” From "shrinkage" to "jerk store," these truly are the best and funniest George Costanza lines of all time. I Can’t Drink Coffee Late At Night. 18. Women always think I'm nice, but women don't like nice….Why is nice bad? You're ravishing. 28. I had so much promise. Well the jerk store called. Derek Jeter: Now, who are you again? I can't even pull in there. $19.59 $ 19. Much can be learned from the great life of Costanza. Kramer goes to a fantasy camp? United States Of America. The plan backfired when George's date found herself incredibly attracted to Jerry's dark and disturbed faux persona. Nationality: I mean, she used me. See more ideas about george costanza, seinfeld, george. Permalink: Wish I could. It's absolutely brilliant.”, “What am I scared of? Sometimes it's the only thing getting me out of bed in the morning.”, “Why did it all turn out like this for me? George often claims that his difficult childhood w… It’s really quite disgusting.”, “Well, I just stomped some pigeons in the park. Do nothing, fall ass-backwards into money, mooch food off your neighbors and have sex without dating. 12. Now back on the fake reunion show that is taking place on Larry David’s “Curb Your Enthusiasm”. 17. With Tenor, maker of GIF Keyboard, add popular George Costanza Hand Model animated GIFs to your conversations. (Singing on his answering machine): Believe it or not, George isn’t at home, / Please leave a message at the beep. Every instinct I have, in every of life, be it something to wear, something to eat…it's all been wrong.”, “I would like to dip my bald head in oil and rub it all over your body.”, “I've never assisted in a birth before. Jerry: Ah, too bad you’ve got a little George Costanza thing goin’ on. Seinfeld Quote #124: Hates Me so Much. Mostly what to avoid doing. I'm not just bored. What kind of sick society we are living in, when nice is bad?”, “God would never let me be successful. A great memorable quote from the Seinfeld movie on Quotes.net - Mr. Lippman: It's come to my attention that you and the cleaning woman have engaged in sexual intercourse on the desk in your office. 15. Couldn't you at least tell her about the shrinkage factor?”. You could let yourself go. It became very clear to me sitting out there today, that every decision I've ever made in my entire life has been wrong. Sign Up Sign In. One of my favorite George Costanza quotes. George Costanza Quotes. If you take everything i’ve done in my entire life and condense it to one day, it’s pretty decent. Should I not have done that? You probably think of these George Costanza quotes every time you're losing your mind. She says, ‘We have to talk.’ Jerry: Ugh. You know you could let the house go. I WAS IN THE POOL!!! '”, “Lunch is fine at the beginning, then you move on to dinner. Do you ever just get down on your knees and thank god that you know me and have access to my dementia? “That's all there is; there isn't anymore.” —Ethel Barrymore, “Why is nice bad? Only 6 left in stock - order soon. 10. Pull together as a team. George Costanza seems in tune with the Corona pandemic of 2020! Is that correct?George Costanza: Who said that?Mr. I invented ‘it's not you, it's me.’ Nobody tells me it's them not me; if it's anybody, it's me.”, “If you can't say anything bad about a relationship, you shouldn't say anything at all.”, “You know what I've come to realize? Golf with a Frisbee. George Costanza: I tell ya, I hear people really stuff themselves on those cruise ships. George, brilliantly played by Jason Alexander, easily had some of the most memorable moments from Seinfeld, so honor him by voting for your absolute favorite lines. 59. This is an incredible idea. © 2021 The Thought & Expression Company, LLC. There, we’ve said it! Sometimes I think it would be easier to bend a spoon mentally than to make that transformation.”, “You're giving me the ‘it's not you, it's me’ routine? 30. 13. I would give up red meat just to get a glimpse of you in a bra. He'd never let me be happy.”, “Listen carefully. I love a good nap. Share the best GIFs now >>> A homebody who ate all day long was the definition of a loser in the world before COVID-19. George Costanza: It's not complicated. Tv Show Quotes Movie Quotes Best Tv Shows Favorite Tv Shows Jerry Seinfeld Seinfeld Meme George Costanza Comedy Lyrics. Listen To … People should plunk down $2000 to live like him for a week. Seinfeld George Costanza Quotes Mosaic Incredible Framed 9x11 Limited Edition Art Print W/coa. George is a timeless and iconic legend whose words ring true, even after twenty years. I don’t know what feel is. George Costanza Quotes Monica: I need to get something.George: Monica, I'm really focused here, this stuff's a killer.Monica: George!George: Wish I could. Clarence: We had to abandon ship. I’m terribly sorry.”, “Articulate—me? Sometimes it’s the only thing getting me out of bed in the morning. I'm scared of the same thing that you are, everything.”, “Y’know, the funny thing is, somehow I find her more appealing now. George has mentioned having a brother a few times on the show though he has never been seen or even given a name. For I am Costanza…lord of the idiots. I wanna be forgotten.”, “Divorce is very difficult. Fandom Apps Take your favorite fandoms with you and never miss a beat. Who do you think is going to be the first ones getting a tour of the ship?”, “I'd rather be dating the blind. Time to taste the fruits and let the juices drip down my chin. 35. ‘Oh yeah? Share the best GIFs now >>> (She exits) “GEORGE:” I was in the pool! I cannot envision any circumstances in which I'll ever have the opportunity to have sex again. Topics: #Seinfeld, #TV Quotes Tags: george costanza, Seinfeld, TV Quotes. His whole life is a fantasy camp. George Costanza: According to this, it took 10 hours. George is the most relatable person on Seinfeld. The snub is good, they love the snub.”, “Y’know, there are tribes in Indonesia where if you keep your coat on in somebody's house, the families go to war.”, “Yeah, I'm a great quitter. How's it gonna happen? / Believe it or not, I’m not home. Or even a walking disaster like George Costanza, the iconic and miserable character from the classic TV-show “Seinfeld”. What kind of a person does this? We use cookies to collect information from your browser to personalize content and perform site analytics. It's like going to a prostitute. 4. Almost feel good to be alive. Believe in it. Discover and share George Costanza Quotes. I proclaim this: The Summer of George!”, “You don't understand. I genuinely dislike her.”, “They're worse! THAT’S a fantasy camp. "You know, I've been thinking. I come from a long line of quitters. That's why I have forty pairs of underwear. Explore our collection of motivational and famous quotes by authors you know and love. Calculate the velocity, V, in relation to the trajectory, T, in which G, gravity, of course, remains a constant. Here are the 10 greatest George Costanza quotes of all time. George Costanza: . They're much worse than us, they talk about everything! Oh, maybe not academically speaking, but...I was perceptive. Completely turn the tables. CTYCHICO Seinfeld Sitcom tv Series Jerry Elaine-Benes George-Costanza on The car Wall Art Print Painting Home Decor Gifts for Lovers Poster. Ever. See more ideas about george costanza, seinfeld quotes, seinfeld. I was personable, I was bright. George Costanza: The buffet, that's the real ordeal, huh, Clarence? And this is how your sexy pictures actually turn out: I take it back. Why should I pay, when if I apply myself, maybe I could get it for free?”, “Because I snubbed her. When the aliens come, who do you think they're gonna relate to? Yes! It's one of the few things I do well. It's simple physics. You see? She has sex with me, leaves ten minutes later, then I never hear from her again. Seinfeld at 25: The show's best quotes 'Jerry, just remember, it's not a lie if you believe it' Seinfeld at 25: The show's best quotes. I just don't see how it could occur." I can't stand doing laundry. My life is the complete opposite of everything i want them to be. On occasion, we also use cookies to collect information from our toddlers, but that’s a totally different thing. 10 “Oh, No, Thanks. If you take everything I’ve accomplished in my entire life and condense it down into one day, it looks decent. I was in the pool! Posted on by maxy * (Jerry’s girlfriend walks in on George as he is changing) “RACHEL:” (She screams) Oh my God! (she looks down) I’m really sorry. 31. It became very clear to me sitting out there today that every decision I’ve made in my entire life has been wrong. Meta • I've never articulated anything, I'm completely incoherent.”, “She thinks I'm a nice guy. Every instinct I have, in every aspect of life, be it something to wear, something to eat – it’s all been wrong. According to wikipedia: “George Louis Costanza is a character in the American television sitcom Seinfeld (1989–1998), played by Jason Alexander.He has variously been described as a “short, stocky, slow-witted, bald man” (by Elaine Benes and Costanza himself) and “Lord of the Idiots” (by Costanza himself). 3.3 out of 5 stars 3. Seinfeld Quote #125: Never Say Giddy-up. 14. Your notice should include (a) a description of the copyrighted work that you claim has been infringed; (b) the URL where the allegedly infringing Site Content is located; (c) your full name, postal address, telephone number, and email address; (d) a statement that you have a good faith belief that the use of the allegedly infringing material on our Sites is not authorized; (e) your physical or electronic signature; and (f) a statement that you are the copyright owner or an authorized agent of the copyright owner. Terms of Use • George Costanza Quotes George: Listen, I know we've had our problems in the past, but we've got a show to do tonight. Explore our collection of motivational and famous quotes by authors you know and love. George Costanza: Well, all vacations have to end eventually. Tags: fanart, live-with-parents, unemployed, idiot, loser I guess I just have to pick myself up, dust myself off, and throw myself right back down again!”, “You know, they always remember the first time. Panicking, George shouted this quote in a desperate attempt to convince her that he was actually the disturbed and depressed one. George: That or ‘Whose bra is this?’ A good-looking blind woman doesn't even know you're not good enough for her.”, “A preemptive breakup. George Costanza decides to do the opposite of his every instinct since his instincts have lead him nowhere in life. With Tenor, maker of GIF Keyboard, add popular George Costanza Shrinkage animated GIFs to your conversations. It's like if I knew she was a lesbian when we went out, I never would've broken up with her.”, “It's like a magic trick. Seinfeld Quote #123: Idiot Friends. Visit our Privacy Policy for more info. If you believe that any Site Content infringes upon your copyright, please notify us by email support@quotecatalog.com. You’re giving me the ‘It’s not you, it’s me’ routine? George Costanza: Hitting is not about muscle. I don't want to be remembered. My father was a quitter, my grandfather was a quitter. The four worst words in the English language. He’s a selfish, neurotic, narcissistic, sleazy liar who has literally sold out everyone in his life just to get a leg up in the moment. 14 Jan 2005 – 1 min read. It's like being demoted.”, “I left three messages. Feb 21, 2019 - Explore Ivelisse Álvarez's board "George Costanza" on Pinterest. Privacy Statement • Mar 20, 2016 - Explore Annie Bebnowski's board "George Costanza" on Pinterest. / I must be out, or I’d pick up the phone, / Where could I be? I feel cheap and violated.”, “This thing is like an onion. 28 Nov 2005 – 1 min read. Discover and share George Costanza Architect Quotes. My mother has never laughed. George: She calls me up at my office. ! Around The Web. The show's best quotes. I invented ‘It’s not you, it’s me.’ Nobody tells me it’s them, not me. George Costanza would indeed be TIME person of the year, for this reason. These George Costanza quotes are from the lord of the idiots. George Costanza is a garbage human. Clarence: The boat sank! 26 George Costanza Quotes Perfect For Your Inner Loser Deep inside all of us lies a malcontent loser with no hope, no future, and no hair. Women, they like that! I’m sorry, I thought this was the baby’s room. Best George Costanza Quotes. You don't move back to lunch. And yourself. Privacy Policy. I was raised to give up.”, “You're luscious. George often grew up with his parents having screaming matches with each other, and frequently criticizing George by complaining about how he wasn't like Lloyd Braun, a neighborhood kid his parents adored. 03 – George Costanza Quote George Costanza (3) I’m 33 years old; I haven’t outgrown the problems of puberty, I’m already facing the problems of old age. But now, staying home is the new cool. 16. I got nothing to lose. 32. They're running outta you.’”, “Frolf: Frisbee golf, Jerry. If it’s anybody, it’s me. In real life, this inner loser manifested itself entirely into a Seinfeld character named George Costanza. I can't believe this woman. There he is, the man himself, George Costanza. D&D Beyond 5. My life is the complete opposite of everything I want it to be. Not a giggle, not a chuckle, not a tee-hee…never went 'Ha! If one stays home, they stay safe. The more layers you peel, the more it stinks.”, “All right. He'd kill me first. -George Louis Costanza in The Label Maker. Lippman: She did.George Costanza: [pause] Was that wrong? I understand women. George Costanza: George Costanza… George is the son of Frank Costanza and Estelle Costanza. I always know when someone's uncomfortable at a party. - George Costanza $11.54 shipping.